I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: A Candid Conversation.

The action icon is rightfully celebrated as an action movie legend. But, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the late 20th century, he also headlined several critically acclaimed comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its 35-year mark this winter.

The Story and That Line

In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger portrays a hardened detective who goes undercover as a schoolteacher to catch a killer. For much of the story, the investigation plot acts as a simple backdrop for Schwarzenegger to share adorable moments with his young class. Arguably the most famous features a child named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and states the stoic star, “Boys have a penis, females have a vagina.” Schwarzenegger deadpans, “I appreciate the insight.”

That iconic child was portrayed by former young actor Miko Hughes. In addition to this part included a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the child stars and the haunting part of the resurrected boy in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with multiple films listed on his IMDb. Furthermore, he frequently attends fan conventions. He recently recalled his recollections from the production 35 years later.

Memories from the Set

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the youngest of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I don't recall being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're flashes. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would take me to auditions. Sometimes it was like a cattle call. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all patiently queue, go into the room, be in there for a very short time, deliver a quick line they wanted and that was it. My parents would feed me the lines and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was very kind. He was playful. He was pleasant, which arguably isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a good work environment. He was fun to be around.

“It would have been odd if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a major movie star because I was told, but I had barely seen his movies. I felt the importance — he was a big deal — but he didn't frighten me. He was just fun and I was eager to interact with him when he wasn't busy. He was busy, obviously, but he'd sometimes engage here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd flex and we'd be hanging off. He was exceptionally kind. He bought every kid in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was a major status symbol. It was the hottest tech out there, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It wore out in time. I also have a genuine metal whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being fun?

You know, it's amusing, that movie became a phenomenon. It was a major production, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was new. That was the coolest toy, and I was pretty good at it. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to pass certain levels on games because I could do it, and I was felt accomplished. So, it's all little kid memories.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember the context? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word shocking meant, but I knew it was provocative and it made adults laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given an exception in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it was conceived, from what I understand, was they were still developing characters. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the kids together, it wasn't pure improvisation, but they refined it on set and, presumably it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, I need time" and took a short while. It was a tough call for her. She said she had doubts, but she thought it could end up as one of the iconic quotes from the movie and she was right.